Really Horrid Vilkyrie
by NightcatMau
Summary: Reposted at reader request, and yes, it is a Vile/Valkyrie pairing. Lime alert, so mature readers only, please.
1. Chapter 1

**Heartbeat**

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A/N: I don't own Vile, Valkyrie, or Skulduggery but if they ever read this, they are sure going to own me. Yes, this is Vile/Valkyrie. Vilkyrie? Vilekyrie? Vale just sounds foolish, so take your pick. Valkyrie is in her 20s, I guess.

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Valkyrie hadn't seen her partner for weeks, but people had seen Lord Vile. He seemed to be traveling across Ireland making his way back to the cave where he'd left his armour. So although it counted as a Very Bad Idea, Valkyrie followed. He was traveling so slowly she knew he was aware of her pursuit and now as they both walked towards the cave Vile several hundred yards ahead of her. Vile even turned at the cave entrance and looked back at her where she had hidden in deepest shadow.

Of course he knew she was there. He was a dead Necromancer, seeing through shadows was as easy to him as seeing in daylight was to others. Vile disappeared into the cave and Valkyrie felt her heart start to jackhammer.

What did he want, leading her here like this? If it was her death he'd have killed her the instant he appeared weeks ago, having stepped out in front of her car on the moonlit road, causing her to slam on her brakes. Vile had tilted his head, regarding her silently, then shadow-walked away before she could even think of reacting.

The problem was, Valkyrie thought miserably, she had reacted. She had the same reaction to him now. That sensation of her heart lurching whenever she looked at him. Everything about him was wickedly elegant, perfectly designed for killing. She was sure she's read cool amusement in his glance, sure that even now as she started automatically towards the cave entrance he'd led her here purely for his own amusement.

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Valkyrie entered the cave, leaving the sunlit world behind. She had to pause to let her eyes adjust, and was aware she made a perfect target. Skulduggery would have scolded her, forced her into the shadows of the cave, but it really made no difference with Vile, so she stood there, adjusting.

When she could at last see she walked in deeper, summoning a flame to guide her through the main entrance and into the twists and turns of the snaking tunnel that led from it. Here and there side tunnels breached off, perfect places to ambush her from, but she followed the main tunnel, not liking how tight it seemed to be getting.

She reached a dead end, and turned, puzzled. Vile should have attacked by now. She couldn't have possibly missed him because her ring felt cold, but not the searing icy cold it did in his presence. She allowed the flame to die out, used the darkness like shadows, reaching out to sense where he was.

Then the ring was searing cold and he was there, shackling her wrists in the dark, draining her magic from her. Vile pulled her close and she felt the icy cold armour that must have been where his mouth would have been come down hard on her mouth. She struggled for an instant, then realized his intent, and relaxed. Vile's attentions deepened and he forced her back against the wall, pinning her hands above her head.

He seemed to be using his shadows to hold her there because she felt him back away. Where was he? Then the darkness started to caress her like a living thing, but still she had no idea where he was. She felt the darkness, perhaps his shadows, curling and sliding into her clothing, exploring, questing for hidden gaps to enter.

She clenched her teeth, unwilling to cry out because she knew he'd win if she did. The shadows and darkness found bare skin at last, and she did cry out. At that the shackles dropped and the shadows retreated. She knew Vile was gone, having perhaps shadow-walked metres away. She stood there, panting slightly, feeling both frustration that things hadn't gone further, and realization that it was why she had followed him all along. She summoned a flame at long last, making her was back through the tunnel.

She figured Skulduggery would be seven kinds of displeased if she ever saw him again, but then, he'd never shown the slightest interest in her. Lord Vile at least was obliging, if a bit of an unfair tease. She knew though that she wouldn't find Vile again until he wanted to be found, and her frustration at his teasing increased. She reached the cave entrance in a foul mood, vowing to do her job and arrest the man the next time she saw him.

She walked to the main road and reached her car, stopping at the sight of the shackles that rested on the hood. Valkyrie reached for them, the icy cold confirming they had been the same ones Vile had used on her. A crooked grin broke out on her face, and she got in, putting them on the seat beside her.

Valkyrie has looked all around her as she was trained to do, but she had failed to spot Vile as he watched her from the shadows of the far off hills, head titled in pleasure at the acceptance of his gift. If she wanted more of him, she would get it, and soon.

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Yeah, kinda creepy, but people seem to love this pairing.


	2. Chapter 2

**Hunger**

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A/N: I don't own Skulduggery, Lord Vile or Valkyrie. this is Vile/Valkyrie or Vilkyrie if you like. Val is in her 20s, I guess.

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Valkyrie woke up under a starry sky, groggy. She'd been sent back in time to try and retrieve a magical artefact and failed. Whomever wanted it had moved first, and caught up with her on a bridge when she fled the castle that had held the artefact. Valkyrie had been hit from behind and had fallen senseless to the river below.

Now, of course, she wasn't in the river. She felt the rough blanket around her scratch at her skin and realized with a start she wasn't wearing her clothes. She shifted her head ever so slightly, worried that she might be captive, and figuring being quiet was her best chance of escape. She saw her clothes drying on a crude wooden rack made of sticks, and before her roasted meat hung over a fire on a spit. She could see, between the dancing flames the man that sat across from her.

The firelight gleamed of his black armour, throwing back reflections that seemed to be caught by his shadows. They writhed around him, a living thing, and Valkyrie felt her heart skip a beat. Lord Vile. She noticed too the artefact was at his feet. That meant her attacker was dead, and she couldn't suppress a small smile.

She felt Vile's steady gaze through the eye slits of his mask and sat up, careful to keep the blanket around her. He was gazing at her intently, silently. He inclined his head towards the cooking meat and she nodded, then took some, rather touched by his offer. He had after all cooked for her, dried her clothes, and put her before a fire so she wouldn't catch cold. They were the things Skulduggery would have done, but this was not Skulduggery across from her. Vile's gaze was steady, almost predatory.

Valkyrie realized she hadn't eaten since she had arrived two days ago, and tore several more strips of meat from the carcass. The meat tasted seasoned, though she couldn't begin to imagine what Vile had used. She licked her lips to try and gauge the flavour and heard a slight noise from Vile. Had he groaned? Surely not. She sat back, satisfied, licking her fingers clean, and this time it was a groan she heard. Valkyrie hid her smile the best she could, and looked into the flames. Steam still rose off her clothes so it would be a while before she could dress yet.

She felt something caress her arm and looked down to see one of Vile's shadows snaking its way around her arm, caressing gently. Then another skirted around her neck, and more until she was covered with writhing shadows that seemed determined to burrow underneath the blanket to her bare skin.

Valkyrie looked across the fire at Vile and could feel his intent. She gave him a crooked grin and rose, stretching, just barely holding the blanket together. Now she heard a low growl from him. She didn't bother to hide her smile as she walked around the fire towards him. Vile rose to meet her, his armoured hands coming to rest briefly on her shoulders. She had secured the blanket around her, leaving her arms free, and he teasingly touched a finger to the place where it was gathered. The tiniest touch really, was all it would take.

Valkyrie rose her arms to put them around his neck, pressing her body flush against his. She felt Vile stiffen, knew his armour was as sensitive as human flesh. She gasped, the icy cold of his armour sending chills through her body. Then he was kissing her, one gauntleted hand cradling her head, the other roaming up and down the side of her body restlessly, seeking new places to explore.

Vile deepened the kiss, that icy cold connection making her senses swim. He stiffened suddenly, pulling away, and Valkyrie could hear approaching voices. Ghastly and his mother were searching for her, drawing nearer. Valkyrie looked back to Vile to tell him, what exactly? Don't kill them? I have to go back now? She felt a flicker of amusement from him as his shadows swirled around her. They shadow-walked and were gone.

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**Valkyrie teasing Lord Vile? Yummy!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Shadowman**

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A/N: I don't own Lord Vile, Skulduggery or Valkyrie. Val is about 40 here, story is in her POV. A billion thanks to **PierDreams** for reviewing!

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Valkyrie was running as fast as she could through the woods, but the Sanctuary agents were closing in. After Skulduggery had died in the explosion, the explosion they set after finding out he was Lord Vile, they wanted her dead as well. She had taken off running, the hidden agents springing into life, coming after her. One had hit her in the back with a magical blast shredding her clothes, and her powers were no longer working.

She stumbled and fell, cursing, but got up and kept running, he would have wanted her to. She still remembered the way he had looked at her the moment he'd realized something was wrong in the Bentley, how he'd displaced the air with such force that she had been forced back and away, the door behind her blown off its hinges, before the bomb took him.

She had thought, just for an instant she had seen him change, but it was impossible. His armour was long gone, and Lord Vile was dead. Valkyrie slowed, realizing the sounds of pursuit had stopped. She came to a halt, listening as Skulduggery had taught her. She heard no sound, but she felt a presence behind her and turned, vowing to fight to the death.

Lord Vile stood before her, his shadows writhing and twisting, lashing out, and she knew how angry he was at that moment. She also knew why she wasn't being chased anymore. Lord Vile stared at her, hard, and she felt no trace of Skulduggery in that cold gaze. Valkyrie walked closer, her breath catching. He was going to kill her, she knew that. But Lord Vile was her one weakness, her one desire. As he stood there in his black armour, his shadows lashing in anger she went to him willingly. Vile watched her approach and she swore she sensed the ghost of a smile behind his visor.

He tilted his head, considering her the way a cat considers a bird, and his shadows surged towards her, enveloping her. They were ice cold and clung to her completely, causing her to gasp in shock. There wasn't a spot on her Lord Vile had missed, and she sensed his intense amusement to her startled reaction. Vile used the shadows to draw her into his embrace, but Valkyrie was already on the verge of fainting from what his shadows were doing to her and he knew it. Vile brought his head down to her and clasped her to him, and the artic sensation took her senses from her.

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Valkyrie awoke in a cave, though where the cave was she had no idea. There was a fire, and game of some kind was roasting on it. Vile was there, watching her intently. Valkyrie got up, watching him warily, but touched that he would feed her. He didn't want her dead then, not yet at least.

"Skulduggery?" She asked. Vile said nothing. "Lord Vile?" At that his head tilted. Skulduggery was gone, maybe for good, and she was in the hands of the man whom she desired most, but with no power to defend herself. She tried to stand and yelped and the pain of the magical strike she'd taken coursed through her. Vile's shadows surged towards her, seeking, touching probing, until they found the wound, and she though she heard him curse softly. He told her to stay with his visored gaze as his shadows swelled around him. Vile shadow-walked and was gone.

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He had come back, holding moss and other supplies in his armoured hands, and gestured for Valkyrie to turn around. She did, wondering how he'd treat her through the clothes, but of course, as she soon realized, he didn't plan to. His shadows surged forward, and she willingly gave in to them. First she felt them teasing and caressing, roaming restlessly before drawing off her jacket.

Then came her armoured shirt as well, leaving her shin bare to the cold of his shadows as the tattered remnants of her bra fell away. Valkyrie instinctively covered herself and swore she heard Vile laughing softly. He was tending to her back then, washing the wound, pressing the moss into it along with dock leaves and what felt like mud. Before she could protest his shadows had torn the remains of her shirt to shreds making a bandage to hold the moss and plants in place.

Vile's gauntleted hand were gentle as he placed the bandage, but Valkyrie still shivered when the back of one brushed against her chest. The time Vile definitely laughed, and his gauntleted hands came to rest on her shoulders, caressing much better than his shadows ever could.

He turned her around and she thought he was going to kiss her again as he lowered his armoured head to hers, the place where his mouth would be nearly touching her waiting lips, but he pulled back, and she could sense his amused smile. He gestured to the fire and food, and she sat grateful to eat, thankful for his continued goodwill. Vile gestured again and his shadows put her jacket on her, dressing her, covering up anything he shouldn't see, for now, at any rate.

Vile watched her eat, seeming to take pleasure from it. "Thank you, for everything, Vile. For saving me, three times now."

He titled his head at her and she didn't know if he remembered.

"In th car, the woods, now here with the treatment. You could have left me to die, why didn't you?"

He shrugged and she wondered how much of Skulduggery was before her, and how much was Lord Vile. No, it had to be Lord Vile. Skulduggery would have changed back, would have been prattling at her, fussing over her. Her partner was dead, and the man before her was what she had left. Valkyrie gave him another smile as he ate and he watched her intently, saying nothing.

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Valkyrie had fallen asleep shortly after eating, her injuries and the shock of the day's events too much for her. When she awoke the fire was low embers. Vile stood at the cave entrance silhouetted in the light of the moon.

There was an unearthly beauty to him now as the moonlight caught the mirrored surface of his armour and was refracted back. His shadows seemed to chase the reflected light, they pulsed almost seeming to react to his thoughts. He must have heard her rise, even though she didn't make a sound she was aware of because he turned, awesome in his dark majesty.

Valkyrie felt her heart lurch, and she realized she was in love with him, as she realized every time she saw him, but this time she admitted it, this time she resolved to show him. She rose to meet him as he strode closer, knowing she had to let a man as masterful as Lord Vile take the lead. He did, his shadows writhing, finding openings to race into in her jacket, first testing the bandage to be sure it was secure, then starting to tease her, and even more shadows toyed with the buttons to the jacket.

But Vile wasn't intent on opening them, he was closing them, buttoning her up tight, and she sensed his wicked delight, because he knew she wanted rid of the jacket in the worst way. Two more shadows caught her wrists, dragging her hands away, leaving her to mewl in helpless frustration as Vile's shadows teased and probed. Then he was letting her sink to the floor weak with desire, and his shadows were retreating back to him. Valkyrie made a sound of frustration, and sensed Vile's smile. She knew then what he planned to do with her, how he'd spend his days taking her to the edge of desire, but refusing to complete her, and she trembled.

Vile just watched her, and she again sensed his smile. She reached a trembling hand towards him, begging for mercy, but Vile was not a man known for being merciful. His shadows swirled around him, enveloping him. Vile shadow-walked and was gone.

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**Bad Lord Vile, bad! Teasing poor Valkyrie like that. But we all know she enjoyed it. XD**


	4. Chapter 4

**Shadows**

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A/N: I don't own Lord Vile or Valkyrie. This was originally a one-shot for my coupling of Lord Vile and Valkyrie. So Vile/Valkyrie or Valkyrie/Vile whichever you prefer. I don't think Vilkyrie sounds right, or maybe it does. Val's about 24 here.

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Valkyrie stood up from the castle floor slowly. All around her lay slain vampires. She had stupidly walked right into their liar, into a trap. She should have been dead, but not a single one had touched her. Somebody had attacked from the shadows, using Necromancy to spear and decapitate them. Vampires had been ripped to shreds in front of her. Some had simply exploded. Shadows had smashed more into walls before they could reach her. The violence and screams were astounding. But still, she was grateful to be alive.

"Hello?" She called, hesitant to walk towards the shadows. Her rescuer strode forth from the shadows, stopping in a shaft of moonlight. It played off his black armour, making him look all the more dreadful as his shadows writhed around him. To Valkyrie, he was the most stunning man she'd ever seen. Lord Vile.

Vile tilted his head, and she felt his intense gaze through the eye slits of his visor. He approached her, his gaze steady on her. Valkyrie opened her mouth to thank him for her rescue, but he held up a hand to silence her. He was right in front of her now, bringing up an armoured hand to caress her face, his touch firm but gentle. Valkyrie tilted her head into his caress, closing her eyes to enjoy the sensation. She brought up her hand to touch the armour over his chest and felt him react as if the armour was sensitive to her touch.

Vile took her hand, pressed it to his chest. So if he could feel her touch, then he could feel everything else too. Vile confirmed her suspicions by bringing his armoured head down to meet hers at an angle, the metal where his mouth would be pressing into her lips. His arms went tightly around her, the gauntleted hands roving up and down her back. She responded with caresses of her own, and his kiss deepened. Vile drew back several paces and Valkyrie could feel the steady gaze from his visor.

He gestured and his shadows flowed towards Valkyrie, roaming up her body in a velvety caress, drawing sighs out of her that were for him alone. Then his shadows retreated and Vile inclined his head gracefully towards her. He shadow-walked and was gone.

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**I know a lot of people will hate this (and the rest of the stories) but it makes sense that if Skulduggery was in love with Valkyrie, Vile would be as well since they are the same man despite people pretending they are not.**


	5. Chapter 5

**Split Decision**

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A/N: I don't own Lord Vile, Skulduggery, or Valkyrie. Vile/Valkyrie shipping, you have been warned! Valduggery as well, yayeth! Uh yeah, Val's roughly 24. Thanks to **AnEnglishRoseLovesStories** for reviewing.

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Valkyrie sat with her head down, thinking. The said one glance was enough to fall in love, and she'd been told once upon a time that she needed a man whose name made her excited every time she heard it. Or was it made her smile? It didn't matter, because Lord Vile made her do both.

She'd been collecting everything she could on him for years, furtively. If Skulduggery knew he never mentioned it, but he tended to ignore the behavior he didn't approve of with her. She knew he regretted being Vile, he'd told her as much countless times. So she knew he'd never understand that when she had fallen in love with Skulduggery she had fallen in love with Lord Vile as well. Skulduggery of course was delighted with her love for him, but if he ever found out about Vile...

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Valkyrie paced restlessly through Gordon's mansion. She loved Skulduggery, she did, and he loved her. But lately she found herself wishing it were Lord Vile in her arms and not the Skeleton Detective. She hadn't said a word, but Skulduggery knew, he just knew, when she wasn't as happy. He'd dropped her off at Gordon's mansion earlier that day, speaking to her before she got out. "Valkyrie? I know there's something wrong, that I'm no longer enough. I want us both to take a few weeks and think about things. I'll contact you, please don't try and contact me."

She hadn't said a word, because he'd been telling the truth, and now she wished with all her heart she'd told her lover the truth as well. But Skulduggery was gone, maybe for good. She paced into the large ballroom that was flooded with moonlight, head down. The air currents alerted her and she snapped her head up to see Lord Vile. He stood with his hands clasped behind his back, head cocked to one side. Vile's shadows danced and writhed around him, mesmerizing her. He stared steadily at Valkyrie through the eye slits on his visor and she felt her heart skip a beat.

"Vile." She breathed.

He gestured and his shadows wrapped around her, drawing her to him. She looked up, meeting his gaze, unafraid. His shadows still held her, but now they danced and wove around her body, seeking purchase. Valkyrie closed her eyes and tilted her head back to enjoy the sensation. Then Vile's armoured head was bending towards hers, and the place where his mouth would be burned ice cold against her lips.

Valkyrie felt her whole body arch into the kiss, exactly the same way she responded for Skulduggery. Vile arms went around her tightly, his hands finding all the places he knew she liked to be touched. He pulled Valkyrie flush to his armour, and the icy cold sensation sent her senses reeling.

It was almost too much, this level of intensity, and her vision swam. Vile gave her one last deep kiss and parted from her. He bowed his head towards her then his shadows rose around him and he was gone.

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The next day, Skulduggery called, told her to be ready in fifteen minutes. He was coming to get her. Even sooner than that she was in the Bentley and he as driving towards his house. He said nothing, and Valkyrie knew he wanted her to speak first. "How did you know?"

"It's amazing what a detective can dig up on people. I'd known about one or two books you had bought on the war, but your purchases, I found, got exceedingly rarer, and only were focused on Lord Vile. I was puzzled at first, even flattered, thought not too much since Vile apparently is more of a man to you then I'll ever be." His words stung, he'd meant them to.

"Skulduggery I love you, you know I do. But yes, when I fell in love with you I realized I was in love with Lord Vile too. He isn't some other man, Skulduggery, he is you. Since I love you I couldn't not love him, can't you see that?"

"I know that. I realized it the moment I knew who you were in love with. The terrible thing was, I knew he was in love with you as well. That I, as Lord Vile, loved you as well. But last night can never happen again, I was a monster as Vile, I don't deserve your love."

"It isn't about deserving, Skulduggery, nobody deserves any of the love they get, ever. It's about me wanting to be with you in every way possible. I'll never mention Lord Vile ever again, but you know I'll never stop loving him." He nodded, parked in front of his house. He's let her in, took her into his arms in the foyer and kissed her deeply, as Vile had the night before. Valkyrie responded eagerly, feeling his hands find the places Skulduggery knew she liked being touched best.

Then somehow, it was Vile who held her, and he deepened the kiss and embrace, walking her backwards until she was pressed against a wall, feeling his armour, icy cold, almost envelop her. This time she withstood his passion better and when they parted minutes later, she touched his armoured visage. His shadows rose up around him, and he was gone. But Valkyrie could already hear Skulduggery calling her from the upstairs bedroom.

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**Yup, that was wrong on so many levels.**


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